Most of my inspiration is from sadness...When I write, I create a release..I have no intention of causing depression from my poetry, if anything I appreciate the ability to express it.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Beam me up

Ghost abort, zen serene.


During the stressful moments of trying to think and communicate on the phone while loud sounds are echoing during important automated messages, I scream in my head, because the call dropped and I will once again be put on hold for an hour maybe two. SILENCE. No such luxury. These stupid and brief points in my day make me reach for an "end it now" button or picture myself jumping through a window. Haha..Not quite, but you may know what I mean if you are a human being.

 So, what do I do? Well, I start mumbling, mumble non sense until I say something that sounds calming and ridiculous. ZEN SERENE, zen serene? YES! ZEN SERENE. I chanted that for a few minutes today, may be a good reason not to have a reality show.Zeeeen serene.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Apocalypse sunrise

Lost in the fire, my belongings turned coal
Memories of sunshine, I'm covered in ashes.
Sounds of sirens, they'll never come.

Apocalypse sunrise, fear this.
Walk on the bright side and you'll be dead by morning.

The life you once lived, is a pipe dream of what can never be.
The heart you once felt, is no longer beating.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Lost in the storm

Storm clouds surround us,
Lightening strikes us apart,
The rains pouring in, silhouettes masked by the fog.

The rivers fill red, the lakes have flood,
Rose petals fall like rain drops, cover the vast sea before us,
Drifting away on a sinking hope, reality takes over...

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

To Evelyn

She smiles with her eyes, golden gate to her soul,
Blue shades of innocence, purity and love.

The curves of her mouth peak high to the heavens,
She laughs a sound of honesty, joy and sentiment.

My little darling, you have my heart,
My sweet daughter, you are my child.
All the gold in the world, is not worth...
 Life without my Evelyn.  


Monday, November 8, 2010

"This is major Tom to ground control, I'm stepping through the door
And I'm floating in a most peculiar way
And the stars look very different today
Here am I floatin' 'round my tin can far above the world
Planet Earth is blue and there's nothing I can do "

Sunday, November 7, 2010


Fall leaves cover the streets,
The night is bright, the moons gazing
Feelings of youth, care free laughs
Spill your drinks, fall in the grass.

Exchange your thoughts with a gift receipt,
The meaning is not hard to sell,
I don't mind the honesty, if only meant well.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010


Caving in, I can't describe the feeling
Losing my heart, in a game of debt.
If wishes were horses I'd be trampled to death,

If dreams could come true would I live?

Friday, October 29, 2010


It's the end of the road, forget your promises.
No more shots in the dark, they've all been forgotten.
The feelings were there, but have vanished.
What are we waiting for?

Seal these lips and save your breath,
Pull down the curtains, they've all turned black.
Lock your memories in a box, bury them until they are lost. 

Begin the new chapter, fill in the blanks.
Embrace your self,
Love your self,
Trust your self,
Rely on your self.
Live the way you should.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

this poem is called " htyw4556"


Did you really feel the change, did you really feel it happening?
A point was given torn, my thoughts are all ignored..

I've expressed myself at best,
Despite what you've heard and said,
I'm done,
I've given all I got.

Open arms to closed doors,
Fond smiles to hurtful words.

Was it worth it?

Friday, October 15, 2010


I wrote this poem for fun, it's sort of a metaphor on how romance no longer exists or is rare. What I like about it is that it paints a picture in your mind and you can perceive it in many ways.

 We met at the dockside,
 The sky covered in stars,
 Dim street lights flicker through the night,
 I knew it was wrong,
 Steam rose from the water, surrounding your warmth,
 A step closer to you, was another step backward.

 My walls caved in, as you stood there before me,
 I had to breathe in, nerves filled my body.
 Our eyes meet for the first time,
  Since a more simple day,
 That time was so long ago,
 I never forgot your face.

It all ended then, you walked away,
I woke to a silent room, it was all just a dream.
Hope appears as dreams, lost fantasies,
My reality a dormant state of mind.
True romance is hard to find.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Songs that are stuck in my head

I am in love with Conor Oberst's mind and am really into the band Cursive right now...I don't know why it is, but male musician and song writers are so much better than chicks, in my opinion at least. And for some reason, this music has really spoken to me, I don't completely relate, but I just feel like I could have written the lyrics myself..If that makes sense....

"Big Bang"

Before we ever saw straight, we were grasping at straws
A debate was born, picket lines were drawn
There was this big bang once, now we're learning to use our thumbs

We need a purpose in life, a survival guide
We need explanations for how we arrived
There was this big bang once, now we're standing on our own two feet
There was this big bang once, we've been sharpening up our teeth

They say there was this big bang once, but the clergyman doesn't agree
, oh no
There was this big bang once, but it don't jive with Adam and Eve
Original sin, that idyllic garden
Some talking snake giving apples away
What would that snake say if he could only see us today?
Ha ha ha!

There was this big bang once, we were left here to fill in the blanks
There was this big bang once, now we're endlessly drifting in space
We're gonna need an explanation for rational thought
Enlightenment and the weight of our hearts
In a world of entropy, why can't we just simply be?
And don't feed me lies, intelligent design

There was this big bang once, why are we back down on our knees?


"Dorothy at 40"

Dorothy, I know you've had amazing dreams
We can't go chasing down each golden street
Each and every rainbow, each passion, each unattainable goal
We're not in dreamland anymore

Dorothy, it seems you'll never understand
This here land is everything we have
Every sweat-stained collar, every dollar,
every bent and bloodied spur
We're not the kids that we once were
We can't be the adults we want to be

Dreams are all you have, dreams have held you back
Dreamers never live, only dream of it
Dream cars, dream houses, dream jobs, dream spouses
Dreams of tornadoes, cities of emerald

And I know we swore we'd make more of ourselves
but this plot is literally our lot in life.

American dreams pollute our cities
Our piece of the pie can't fill our bellies
(More!) More square inches
(More!) Picket fences
(More!) Clothes on the line
(More!) Naps at noontime
More of our fair share
More of our birthright
More of what we're owed


Paid vacation
(More!) Entertainment
(More!) Compensation
(More!) Gratuitous gratification

Dorothy, wake up, Dorothy, wake up
Dorothy, wake up, it's time for work


 "Lover I don't have to love"

I picked you out
Of a crowd and talked to you
Said I liked your shoes
You said "Thanks, can I follow you?"
So it's up the stairs
And out the aim of prying eyes
I poured some wine
I asked your name
You asked the time

Now it's two o'clock
The club is closed, we're up the block
Your hands on me
Pressing hard against your jeans
Your tongue in my mouth
Trying to keep the words from coming out
You didn't care to know
Who else may have been you before

I want a lover I don't have to love
I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck
Where's the kid with the chemicals?
I thought he said he'd meet me here but I'm not sure
I got the money if you got the time
He said, "It feels good"
I said, "I'll give it a try"

Then my mind went dark
We both forgot where your car was parked
Let's just take the train
I'll meet up with the band in the morning

Bad actors with bad habits
Some sad singers
They just play tragic
And the phone's ringing
And the band's leaving
Let's just keep touching
Let's just keep keep, keep singing

I want a lover I don't have to love
I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk
Where's the kid with the chemicals
I got a hunger and I can't seem to get full
I need some meaning I can memorize
The kind I have always seems to slip my mind

But you, but you
You write such pretty words
But life's no storybook
Love's an excuse to get hurt
And to hurt
Do you like to hurt?
I do, I do
Then hurt me (x10)

-Bright Eyes

"Sunrise, Sunset"

Sunrise, sunset.
Swiftly go the days.
Sunrise, sunset.
You wake up, then you undress.
It always is the same.
A sunrise and a sunset.
You are lying while you confess, keep trying to explain.
The sunrise and the sun sets you realize
and then you forget what you have been trying to retain.
But everybody knows that it is all about the things
that get stuck inside of your head,
like the songs your roommate sings
or a vision of her body as she stretches out on your bed.
She raised her hands in the air and asked you,
When was the last time you looked in the mirror?
Because you have changed.
Yeah, you have changed.
Sunrise, sunset.
You are hopeful and then you regret.
The circle never breaks.
With each sunrise and sunset there is a change of heart or address.
Is there nothing that remains?
For a sunrise or a sunset.
You are manic or you're depressed.
Will you ever feel ok?
It's a sunrise and sunset, your lover is an actress.
Did you really think she would stay?
For a sunrise and sunset.
You are either coming or you just left but you are always on the way.
Towards a sunrise or a sunset, a scribble or a sonnet.
They are really just the same.
To the sunrise and the sunset.
The master and his servant have exactly the same fate.
It's a sunrise and a sunset.
From a cradle to a casket.
There ain't no way to escape.
The sunrise and the sunset.
Hold your sadness like a puppet, just keep putting on the play.
But everything you do is leading to the point
where you just won't know what to do.
And at that moment you may laugh
but there is someone there who will be laughing louder than you.
So it's true, the trick is complete.
Now you have become everything you said that you never would be.
You're a fool! You're a fool!
Sunrise, sunset, sunrise, sunset.
The sunrise and the sunset.
Sunrise, sunset.
Go home to your apartment
and put the cassette in the tape deck and let that fever play.
Sunrise, sunset.

-Bright Eyes

Monday, October 4, 2010

For a friend

You took that journey, to the foreign land
Just a year ago, you were a different man

Question yourself a thousand times, wonder if you could take it back..
The sands of time fill your thoughts,
Minutes move like hours, and hours are days, when that time comes, will you be the same?

And I know you can win, just like you always did..
The days won't be dark soon enough,
And all that you've worked hard for,
And all that you've lost,
Is waiting for you in your families arms. 


Tuesday, September 28, 2010


Cells multiply and soon create life,
Your almost here, the darkness descending
Warmth all round, you've beat all the odds.
Weeks will go by, no longer a dream.

My emotions on rise, I can't wait to meet you,
I feel your heart, beating along with mine.
Eternal love, bubbles like champagne,
You can hear my voice, sing you lullabies.

I am give you the world.


Monday, September 20, 2010

Out with the old, in with the new!

My first poems since forever ago...I've had such a long dry spell and forgot how much I love to write poetry. The beauty of it is you don't need to make much sense as long as YOU get it, everything you write is a definition of your feelings. In a way, it's like you are the main focus and if no one gets it, who cares.


A blooming flower,
A birds last flight,
The seasons changing,
I think I might.

Stars are born.
The night everlasting.
Sunshine occurs only on special occasions. 

"Goodbye tomorrow"

Another day passed,
Calendar weekend.
It's already booked,
All the hours are spent
And I look at the time,
And it's already Tuesday,
I didn't think twice,
but I think it's your Birthday.

If I sit here still, will think to say sorry?
If I rest my head, will you tell me not to worry.
And everything is fine, but your funerals tomorrow.

I guess I've lost time and I can't turn to you anymore.


Hidden inside your mask of lies,
Claim to be what's in your disguise,
Like many before have fallen in your trap,
Posing as the helpless lamb.

Searching deep, do anything to fit in,
No matter what's beneath your skin,
You'll always be fake within.
Do you feel that's worth your life?
Wasting all on worthlessness,
Must be what's in your reflection,
Seeking relation, but are far from perfection.

"Not my time"

Wistful thoughts cloud my mind,
Realization hurts too much.
Memories of a different past,
Do you remember me?

The moment was yesterday,
Now it's gone, all that's left is the future.
Am I strong enough to carry on?
Or is this my departure.

If I remembered correctly,
You were the golden girl, always looking for a laugh,
Now you've gone down the dark road,
Where you are always back tracked.


I'm an actress, tragedy on a destructive path.
I'm a believer, searching for the truth that I can't explain.

Formal dinners and rain soaked boots,
It's hard to believe when you act out abused.

Crystal stemware and swollen black eyes,
speaking the truth never proved to be wise.

These streets never seemed darker,
I've ceased to exist,
The smokes in the water,
I'll put on my fins.

If I get closer to that holy land,
I'll tell you the secrets of evolution. 

More to come....